Christmas gift for the Yarn Widower - Part 1

I'm going to let you in on a little secret: the Yarn Widower, well, he knows how to knit.  When we first met, I was just picking up knitting again and to show me how cool he was and how much we had in common, he said, "My nan taught me how."  And lo and behold, he knit up a little scarf (where is that thing?) and I was duly impressed.

So impressed that I thought I would give him a sweater's worth of yarn for Christmas.  14 hanks of Rowan Chunky Tweed in a dark rich forest green.  Along with a pattern book from Kim Hargreaves - Rowan: The Tweed Collection.  Both the yarn and the book have since been discontinued as this was over a decade ago.  But at the time, it was our first Christmas together and I wanted to give him something special (but not too special since we had only known each other a few months). And since it was yarn and not a knitted sweater, I was clearly exempt from the Boyfriend Curse (she who dares to knit her boyfriend a sweater dooms the relationship forever).  When he opened my gift to him, I was fairly aglow with anticipation.   He lit up mildly and was polite.  "Oh, look.  Yarn.  How nice." 

Thankfully, our relationship endured.  Even if the yarn languished in storage for many many years.  Actually, after that initial interest in knitting (feigned in his case; genuine in mine), we both put down the needles.  Ten years later when my life had finally slowed down, I felt a very strong urge to pick up knitting again and have at it.

And since then, the Yarn Widower has often complained that I have made many sweaters but none for him.  "You can knit your own sweater," I say.  "You have everything you need and you already know how."

Yarn Widower recoils and acts horrified, "I do NOT know how to knit!  That's my story and I'm sticking to it.  By the way, I would like cables but not too many cables and a high neck but not a turtleneck. Also, I would like you to use that nice wool you bought for me although I don't know why you bought me yarn since I don't know how to knit."

Sheesh.